Years ago I joined a direct sales company, Mary Kay Cosmetics. I was fresh out of high school and didn’t know what I wanted to do next. No college for me, at least not at that time. At the time I had a husband, no children and was just struggling to make ends meet. (Yes I married young) Mary Kay preached God first, family second, and career third. I would silently roll my eyes each time this came up in our meetings. To me it was ALWAYS, career first! How fast can I make money?!
Now let’s fast forward a few years, I’m a wife and mother. I spent years working myself up the corporate ladder, leaving my children’s precious moments to be enjoyed by strangers. Their first steps, first words, first kisses and hugs. For what? So that I could succeed in a company and make a better life for us. Bigger house, better schools, more experiences. It was still CAREER first!! Oh if I could only slap myself into reality.
As my 2nd child goes on to his next phase in life, the Toddler years, I realized right there and then how much I have missed. By the time he turned 6 months I was juggling new work hours, new school drop off times, and more pressure from the office. I was already showing signs of breakdown. Then he has his first ear infection, recovers, and has another 2 weeks later, the cycle is unending. Sound familiar? Speaking with other mom’s it is pretty common. In fact I had gone thru the same with my eldest not too long ago, inserting tubes and removing her adenoids corrected this. I shrugged, prepared for the familiar steps and went back to work. See CAREER first, again!
Then it hit me, I made a mistake at work. Pretty big, but somewhat fixable, I hope… I don’t make mistakes. Okay I do but not ever this big. The baby had been sick for the last few weeks. Then my eldest, then me. They both were put on a nebulizer, yet again a common occurrence in our household. After little sleep I realized that this is not the “better” life I had wanted for my children. An absent work crazed sleep deprived mother? No, not the life at all.
After some deep soul searching I realized, I was doing this all wrong. That Mary Kay sure knows what she was talking about! I reread her book and it is so inspiring. Duh! It’s so simple! GOD first, Family second, and Career third!
Now my relationship with God hasn’t always been as glamourous as you might think. It has been a rollercoaster! When I was younger at one point I wanted to be a nun. As you can see he had a different path for me. I married young, a few years later he was in a car accident and didn’t make it. I was left a widow, with no children and he was an only child. I blamed God, then I blamed the other driver, and then myself. It was a dark few years. Then I prayed, I prayed, and I prayed to find happiness. Low and behold a random night out led me to my Husband of today. I thanked God. He was back in my life but always in the back of the line.
So now let’s focus on today. I left my job, it was a pretty sweet one too. My husband and I agreed that my stress from juggling everything and making everyone as happy as possible, bleeds into the rest of the house. My stress caused everyone to walk around on egg shells. “Don’t look it in the eye” I heard by hubby tell our 4 year old. That “it” was me. My last day was this Friday.
What is my plan you may ask? Well it’s to put my life back in order. To put what is important first, my faith in God. My Family’s needs. My career? Well that can wait. I have little ones that need me. We have memories to make!
This new “life” won’t be easy. We’ll have financial struggles to deal with and lots of adjusting. “What do you mean we can’t have a cleaning lady?!” , “you want me to clean, cook, and keep our kids alive?”…it’s going to be interesting. BUT! I have this blog to keep me sane.